Today, in memory of my mother

Today is the 10th anniversary of the death of my mother. She was 92 at the time of her death. The cause of death was congestive heart failure, but all in all she was in pretty good health. She'd had several episodes of CHF during that year and her last trip to the hospital was about 2 weeks before. I was with her at the last time she was conscious that day - she had specified DNR, having always detested the idea of a long illness and often mentioned how fortunate my father was to die almost instantly from a massive heart attack. She was cremated the next day and her ashes tossed at sea by the Neptune Society (she having prearranged that) - these wishes were partly based upon the lots of family history about care of graves and visits to them. She had said that you are not really dead until your obituary appears in the New York Times, so I did that.

She lived alone in her manhattan apartment, walked with canes or a walker, and used Access-A-Ride (MTA van by appointment) to go distances of more than several blocks which she did a few times a week. Her apartment building had a nice garden between the two buildings and she hung around there a lot in good weather talking to friends.

She played Duplicate regularly and had played just a day or so before her last episode. I chose to hold her memorial service a few months later at the Manhattan Bridge Club, which was her regular place to play. I'd asked her how she wanted to handle this - she didn't want it in a temple, and when I suggested the bridge club she thought that was a great idea and the owner/director was fine with it.

She was a fine lady, a good mother and wife, and I really miss her.

( Some things I talked about at the service )